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Wednesday, May 28, 2014

My First Time Becoming A Mom

As we are getting closer I am getting hit with all of these emotions again.

3.06 months.  92 days.  13.14 weeks.  2208 hours.  132480 minutes.  7948800 seconds.

This is all the same amount of time until little man's due date.

I cannot imagine not being pregnant.  I love it!

My mom has told me my whole life that she loved every second of being pregnant with both me and my brother.  I always thought she was silly and didn't understand.  How can you love the feeling of someone growing inside of you and making you sick and kicking you all the time?  Well my mom was lucky and was never sick and while pregnant with me, I never moved.  She would always say that I would just push on her sometimes but never went crazy and wild while I was growing.

I now know exactly what my mom was saying.  I absolutely love being pregnant.  I can't imagine not being pregnant.  I want to meet our son so badly but at the same exact time I want him to stay inside of me forever and continue to be my favorite accessory.

Sure having people be nicer at work is a perk because of him, but that's not why I want it to last.  I want to forever have the feeling of providing life for my baby.  Without me he wouldn't survive.  Without me he wouldn't be safe and sound.  Without me he wouldn't be warm and snuggly.  Without me he wouldn't be growing big and strong.  

But then I think, without him inside of me, I can do all these things still.

I will still make sure he survives.
I will still make sure he is safe and sound.
I will still make sure that he is warm and snuggly.
I will still make sure that he grows up big and strong.

I won't ever have a first-time mom pregnancy again.  My husband won't ever be begging for ultrasounds at every appointment again because now we know the drill and when we get them and when we don't.  We will never experience our first baby together again.

This makes my heart sad, just as not having Baby H inside me does, but then I think about all that it means for us after he is born.

I will get to see my husband and son bond and become best friends.
I will get to see Baby H grow up learning how to hunt and fish just like his Daddy and Grandpa.
I will get to see my husband coach little league and help our son become the best athlete he wants to be.
I will get to watch my son learn how to sit up, crawl, walk and talk.

I cannot truly imagine what life has in store for us once Baby H is born but I know that as much as I am scared for it, I know that it will be just as amazing as this pregnancy has been.  Our son will be loved and cherished and reminded daily that he is amazing and exactly what we wanted.  We wouldn't trade where we are in life right now for anything and I couldn't be more thankful and excited.

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2 comments:

  1. omghs time has flown! I bet you are so excited! Baby H will be here before you know it!

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  2. this was the exact same feeling i had while writing my 28 week post. so true.

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