This wasn't exactly how I pictured blogging again for the first time in a very long time, but this has been bothering me so much over the past year and seems to be coming up a lot more often now.
I don't know if this will resonate with many, or anyone for that matter, but I'm sure I'm not the only parent feeling this way.
"Are you going to try for a girl?"
I don't know about you, but I definitely don't feel like this is the first thing I would ask a parent. True, I am often curious about other people's families and how they decide their quantity and what not, but just that. Quantity, not gender!
I have multiple friends who have either all girls or, like me, all boys and the only thing I ever think about asking any of them is if they want more kids. I don't understand the world's, err society's, obsession with having children of both sexes. Why does it really matter?
I remember the second I announced that I was pregnant with Baby E, people just instantly asked if I was hoping for a girl? Hoping? Doesn't that make it sounds terrible if you say yes and it turns out to be the opposite? Then you are disappointed right? I never hoped for a boy or girl with Baby E. I really hoped for a healthy baby that stayed in my belly as long as s/he could.
I hate that now that we have two boys, people think that it is okay to say we need to try for a girl. Do you all realize that it is a 50/50 chance? And science fact: it's not up to me!
And if we are being honest. I would have a million babies, okay maybe not a million, but you get it. I would pop babies out until God decided I couldn't anymore, but I don't think we would ever get a girl and that would be just fine with me.
I feel like I was meant to be a #boymom. I might not know what I am doing yet and I definitely don't know how I am going to handle puberty and all of the testosterone and smells, but I know that I will figure it out.
I know that I will embrace all of the macaroni necklaces instead of pretty beads.
I will embrace the rocks and worms as treasures instead of baby dolls and tea parties.
I will love watching my boys learn to hunt and fish and provide for their future families from my amazing husband.
I will be perfectly happy with my boys for the rest of my life.
My Boys are enough for me and that should be enough for you to accept.
So next time you see a parent with all boys or all girls, instead of asking if they are going to continue to try for the other, why not just ask if they want more kids or if their family is complete?
Yes! I would LOVE to have a girl some day but if I have 5 boys I would be just as happy! I'm sure people mean well but always ending up shoving their foot in their mouths. Your boys are precious and I know you wouldn't trade them for anything :)
ReplyDeleteP.S. I know several families from my hometown who had 3-6 kids, all of whom are boys. Like you said, you could literally have a million kids and on some off chance, they could all still be boys lol. Kids are blessings no matter their gender!